Voluntoldism and Becoming More Social

I've been in Santo Domingo for 16 months now and have pretty much kept to myself and my family on the weekends. I don't think I'm antisocial by nature; however, I feel really awkward and uncomfortable in big groups of people that I don't know. So in general, I don't go to happy hours, dinner club parties, or anything else that involves the wider community. I have only been "invited" to one Ambassador event during my tour but I was out of the country and I've attended 3 community-wide events during the past 16 months: The Holiday Party at the Ambassador's Residence last December, the Health Fair, and the Green Festival. I didn't even feel like waiting around for hours with cranky children to take a picture with the Secretary of State last month when she was here visiting. And I've only had people over for dinner three times - and that is primarily because my chef-like husband loves cooking for company.

Well last month was bidding season for me and in one of my conversations with a Mission where I really hope to go, I learned that the inter-agency community is close-knit and people are always getting together in the evenings and on the weekends. The community is also a bit smaller than the DR's mission and the city doesn't have nearly as many independent entertainment options as Santo Domingo.

So after talking to someone from my mission of choice, I told myself and my husband that I'm going to have to do better, drink a cup of courage and start participating in more activities and socializing with people more often. I hadn't decided on when, but I was thinking some time between January and August 2012. I was on the fence about practicing here in Santo Domingo or waiting until we move to our new country and starting anew there.

Well, thanks to the Foreign Service's overseas voluntoldism policy and God hearing my "cry", a couple of opportunities were presented to me within the last couple of weeks.

First, I received a phone call about from an unknown (to me) woman that went like this:
Woman: Hi, Ayana?
Me: Yes, this is Ayana
Woman: Hi, I'm AJ and MW told me you'd be interested in being a cocktail model for the Green Fashion Show in a couple of weeks.
Me: Noooooo, hmm...I think maybe MW got mixed up because I wrote to the CLO and told her that my SON could be in the fashion show if you guys needed male models.


*side note* I know I was wrong for that, but I DID volunteer my teenager after checking with him because I felt like he could take up my socializing slack since he's so confident. I had recently entered him in the tennis tournament too. So I was socializing by proxy.

Woman: Oh yeah, well we've had a few people volunteer their spouses and if we need male models I'll include him. But really - MW said you'd be a great cocktail model. You don't have to walk on the runway. She said you'd be great for this role because we need someone who smiles alot and who will walk up to the guests and tell them about the dress you're wearing and the designer that'll design the dress.
Me: oh okay, sure.
Woman: GREAT! There's a meeting tomorrow and hopefully you can make it.

Now, I DO smile alot and I'm sure that is why MW, my Mission Director's WIFE, gave my phone number out and suggested me; however, what she DOESN'T know is that it is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HARRRRRRRRDDDDDDDDD for me to walk up to perfect strangers and start talking to them. But, what's a first tour officer who never participates in anything to do? Accept the challenge! So I did and below are some pictures of me being a cocktail model and wearing green superhero makeup to support my Country.

This is why I was NOT voluntold or asked to be a runway model apparently.

Designer of my dress - Ines de Sanctis

Getting dressed in my upcycled outfit from upholstery fabric and curtains-turned-dress.

In the end, I enjoyed myself, met some new people (although a couple of folks asked if I'd just joined the mission a couple of months ago), and felt good about contributing to something for the greater good.


In the same week, I was on email message sent to a handful of people from my agency inviting us to hear remarks from the US Attorney General and take a group picture.  Although my initial reaction was "no way ", I was glad I went.

On the subject of BATHROOMS

In my home these days, 'tis the season for contemplating how life will inevitably change for my family next summer when we relocate to "who knows where". As such, yesterday Dear Hubby and I were pontificating about potential housing at the next post when the subject of bathrooms came up.

I mentioned that, "it's totally possible that we won't have as many bathrooms in our house next time" based on the pictures I've seen of some houses in different countries that are on my list.

Now according to Dear Hubby, he needs to to have his own bathroom to ensure complete privacy and the ability to spend endless amounts of time without being bothered by our Dear Children.

And as for me, I don't want to share a bathroom with Dear Hubby, my oldest son, or my youngest son.

Our conversation about how many bathrooms we need got me to thinking about just how spoiled we've become in less than 18 months. You see - I grew up in a home with four females and one tiny bathroom and somehow we did just fine with what we had. Dear Hubby grew up in a rural, lesser developed area and had one bathroom too to share with three siblings and two parents.

In 2005, I stayed with a host family in Xela, Guatemala and had to leave the bedroom, physically walk outside (and past a dog and for those that know me that was scary), through a door and into a standalone bathroom, flip a switch and pray the "hot" water would at least reach 60 degrees.

In 2006, I lived in a house in Lasso, Ecuador that required me to leave the room, walk outside and across a wooden board covering a "river" or drainage ditch to get to the other side of the yard and use a standalone bathroom. In that same year, I lived in Salcedo, Ecuador and although I had moved up in the world, I still had to walk outside to get into my bathroom that was attached to the outside of the kitchen. AND to top it all off, water was only available from 7 a.m. - 7 p.m. so taking a late night shower or flushing the toilet in the wee hours of the night was just not possible.

Fast forward to recent years and "upscale" Fairfax County, VA living - Dear Hubby, my three children, and I shared a townhouse with 1.5 bathrooms and again - we made it just fine.

But NOWWWWW we've had a taste of the good life for a full 16 months with a bathroom in all four bedrooms, a half-bath under the stairs, and a full bath outside the pool area (don't get excited - we covered the pool) and we almost completely lost our minds and our sense of grounded reality because we just can't fathom living in a home with only 3, or even worse - 2 bathrooms.

So this post is a reminder to me to (1)remain appreciative, (2)stay grounded, and (3)keep it together as I move on, up, and around in the world.